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yasmin j : TX

Hi. First of all, the reason I decided to visit this website is that I got to a point where Im so sick of friendly pick ups and 'youll be okay' hopefull sentences. My name is Yasmin. I am 20 years old in a few days and I am from London. I was diagnosed with Adenocarcinoma lung cancer at the age of 17, It's genetic. My mum had cancer at the age of 27 and passed away at the age of 31. When I was younger, me and my twin sister had scans and tests to see wether any of us could possibly have cancer in the future.they told us that my sister had a 70% chance of having cancer and I had a 30% chance. My sister is healthy and with a kid now.I'm the one suffering while Im really young and living a nightmare. When I was diagnosed, I wasn't intending on knowing wether Im sick or not. I was caughing for about a month and I thought it was just a random cold. So I ignored it. I went with my brother to hospital after he had a small car accident, and when some doctors heard me caughing like that, they asked me wether I fainted recently, and I did. So they asked me not to freak out and to stay at the hospital for a while to have some tests. after them tests I was ready to go home, but a doctor stopped me and told me to go to his office. I was walking and hearing my heart beating ten times faster than my footsteps. I knew something bad is about to be said. Im not the very emotional kind of girls, I tend to hide my fear. So when the doctor asked me a few questions in his office I was very quiet and answered most of them with NO although I shouldve said yes. I was in denial before even hearing it. He finally spat it out and told me Ive got lung cancer and that I should be treated immediately. I went home, and sat on my kitchen floor. I wanted to cry so hard but I just thought to my self if my mum was here she wouldve hated it. And the next day I had my first chemo session. I had chemo for over 2 years. It showed some progress.then Tumors were found also in my brain. So I started radiation and it was only for 3 months and showed mo progress at all so at that point I was just daily dizzy, sick, scared. I got to a point where my social life is dead. My studying, is horrible. I couldnt cope with so much stress and no one to open up to. It was only my sis and my bestie who knew what I was going through and calling them to tell them just how shit Im doing felt so selfish to me so I kept it all in. So now Im not going through therapy. Im told I don't have much time left.

First Published: 9/23/2015 2:59:00 PM

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